The Cobra Nimbus. Because looking your best in the dark takes skill and dedication. $389.99. Who on earth buys this kind of stuff (and don’t say bird-watchers, OK?)

‘Manufactured by a company that makes high-spec models for the armed forces, this Nimbus headset will give you night vision like you’ve just eaten a ton of carrots and it’s perfect for any of you who are into badger spotting or a bit of pitch-black paint-balling. I found it perfect for finding the fridge in the middle of the night.’