The Tyko iType2 is a rather ingenious Playstation 2 controller with a built in QWERTY keyboard for chatting wid da homies (is that right, Martha?). Around $39.00. ‘Use all the standard features of a regular PlayStation�2 controller and instant message other players so you stay in the action. Key in messages and commands while gaming online without a separate keyboard…4 programmable text macros for instant messaging’

The Talking TP doohickey is a….um….toilet paper holder with built in recorder. No wait, come back. Look, they say it can be really useful for things like…er…reminding men to put the seat down, kids to wash hands, asking girlfriends to marry you (!) or even as a sort of family memo device. The idea of a family communicating with each other in this way gives a whole new meaning to the phrase ‘quality time’, does it not? Anyway, yours for…

Vox 2.0 TV Box. Time was when a television unit did nothing more than squat menacingly in the corner of a darkened room, daring you to turn it on and suffer. Now they come in credit card sized USB 2.0 modules with PVR time shifting, scheduled recording, video capture, CD ripping and remote control. And all for the price of a packet of cigs (well OK, $79.00 to you, my son). [Thanks Roy!]

Pray tell me good lady, why would anyone need to purchase a set of $39.00 camouflage portable speakers? To blend in with their SwatPod, perhaps? Yours, Mystified of Carshalton.

OnlineConversion.com – ‘Convert just about anything to anything else. Over 5,000 units, and 50,000 conversions.’ Bookmark.

Abcde..z.com offers the world’s longest email address. That’s right, the whole English alphabet. Example? ferret@abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyzabcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyzabcdefghijk.com. Must be a spoof right?

So researchers have come up with an eye gaze correction system called i2i that aims to make us look less shifty on videophones? Judging by the mugshot above, I’m not sure it works that well. ‘one of the problems with current one-to-one videoconferencing is that the speakers do not appear to be looking at each other. The incorrect eye-gaze problem is due to the fact that the webcam looks at each person at an angle. The i2i technology can correct…

The DOS Games Archive. Er..an archive of DOS games. I love this random quote on the site too… ‘”…the best way to prepare [to be a programmer] is to write programs, and to study great programs that other people have written. In my case, I went to the garbage cans at the Computer Science Center and fished out listings of their operating system.” – Bill Gates (Microsoft Corporation)

The Smart Glove – ‘is designed to protect your wrist from injury and to ease pain caused by: Repetitive Motion Injury, Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, Tendinitis, and Cramping and Fatigue.’ $16.95. See also the left or right handed Quill Mouse $99.95 …

ml_iPod. ‘ml_ipod is a plugin for Winamp 2.9x/5.x which allows you to manage your iPod using the Winamp Media Library.’

Eeeeyyeeeuugggghhh!

The new BeamerFX is a dual purpose vid ‘vice. Not only (some would say not even) a videophone, but also a digital picture frame. So when you’re not calling your loved one, you can remind yourself what they look like. Just in case. $299.99. ‘Beamer FX is designed to instantly add live, color motion video to your phone calls, over a standard (analog) phone line. The quality of your phone line connection will have some impact on the video quality,…

The Scorpion 2 in 1 Pepper Spray & Stun Gun. For those times when the sucka just won’t leave ya alone. What a wunerful world, eh? $129.95. ‘If you’re fortunate enough to spot an attacker from afar you can temporarily blind them with an accurate liquid stream of fire from up to 6 feet away. In most cases when an aggressor surprises you and gets close it’s over. The Scorpion gives you a fighting chance. Most standard stun guns only…

Is this a case of a little too little, a little too late? The VCR Co-Pilot – ‘If you can tell the time, you can program your VCR’. Where were these guys for all those decades when 12:00 was remorselessly flashing on machines across the globe? And now they arrive, when the VCR is finally going dodo? Around $29.95. ‘The VCR Co-Pilot…uses graphical slide switches and analog dials. The familiar metaphor of a clock face makes it intuitive. Slide switches…

Um..isn’t marking down a patriotic toy bear from $29.95 to $19.95 now an offence of treason under the Patriot Act or something? ‘…this lovable natural color shearling bear is dressed in a patriotic red, white and blue knit tee. Just press the embroidered American flag heart applique on his foot and U.S. Trimble T. Bear� will play a soothing rendition of “God Bless America.”‘