The iBeam Optical Timepiece. $99.95. It’s a watch. No it’s not, it’s a timepiece. With a magnifying glass. And LED flashlight. Oooh!!  Built into the watch’s face is an optically certified 5x magnifying lens that pops up at the touch of a button. This is especially handy when it comes to reading maps, menus, food labels, phone books… Also discreetly hidden in the watch’s casing is a high-powered LED flashlight. This light turns on and off with a touch of…

The 9999 in 1 games console. $10.95. The Ferret got caught out once before with one of these supposed uber games consoles (actually only had 100 games in it). Call us gullible but here’s another one. Now c’mon, why do you folks keep reading our drivel, it’s quite clear that we’re dumb as a rock!  9999 Computer Games and Calculator. Features tons of games: super brick games, shooting brick games, bowling games, boxing games, car racing games, pinball games, space invaders games, shooting…

The Payphone Alarm Clock Bank. Shame this isn’t a real payphone too. That would be super silly…neat. $45.00.  The hour and minute hands glow in the dark for easy readability at night. The alarm feature sounds like the ringing of a telephone with some background music. When the On / Off switch is pressed an operator will say “Good Morning! In order to speak 3 minutes more, please deposit twenty-five cents.”

The Slide Rule Watch. I’m sorry, but to do this properly they really ought to have made it steam driven too. But hey, it’s a start. $250.00.  This watch from Torgoen will allow you to step back in time a little bit. Featuring a circular slide rule that can solve time, distance and speed equations, it can also perform a wide variety of calculations. These include currency conversions, multiplication and division and any conversion of a linear nature such as…

May we gently suggest that you forego the traditional annual pilgrimage to Nevada this year and stay home with the family and your 19 inch Mega Million Slot machine instead? You’ll probably save much more than $330.00.  Identical sounds and lights of real machines. Pull the handle to spin the reels. Automatic jackpot releases all the coins.

Take one European Solar Oven (Specially designed mirrors collect solar energy and concentrate it…enough to boil, stew, grill, or bake most foods in one to two hours) a Picnic Table in a box (portable solid ash table set and nylon umbrella that unfolds from its own integrated 12” x 48” case…less than two minutes of setup), throw in a Rolling Cooler with Radio (has multiple insulated sections, durable wheels, and a built-in AM/FM radio, all of which you can pull behind you…

The Sonic Devestator. $300.00 assembled. Scary sausages.  This handheld space age weapon of the future is powered by (2) 9 volt batteries conatined [sic] within the handle. It is capable of emitting intense ultrasonic blasts from its output transducer…It is effective for approximately 20ft but some people are even effected at distances as great as 50ft… A good example of the type of irritation it produces is to say its like somebody scratching their fingernails on a chalkboard but at 130…