Look, what is it exactly with mousepads and people? Are they content with a simple, flat, rubberised mat for rodent rapidity? Oh no, they have to go and Turbo it up like some sad desktop pimpmobile. The Mouse Pad Calculator with Radio. $19.95.

‘Combines a Mouse Pad, Calculator, Digital Alarm Clock and FM Radio Scanner. So you can listen while you work. Speaker with excellent sound quality. Earphone jack and Volume control.’