The Casio Sea Pathfinder is a watch for pirates, laddy. Not for lily livered land-lubbers with wrists the size of a string bean. Ahar there…! [Thank you, I think we’ve all identified the oceanographic reference by now – Ed] And just in case you’re thinking of wandering anywhere near the Bermuda Triangle, it comes with its own ‘abnormal magnetic field detect function’. $174.95.   It displays weather information and vital data required for seafarers, boating and yachting enthusiasts. Packed with features,…

The Intercom/Sound System. From $999.99. Yes, you too can now recreate that Stepford Wives Wal-Mart type atmosphere in your home instantly, complete with cheesy muzak and cheery announcements. Hoorah!  Monitor and communicate with your family through an intercom that acts as a full sound system. Program through the master station, which controls intercom functionality at the room and weather-resistant patio stations, which can in turn control the system’s music power, volume and up to four music sources. Speak to visitors…

The Harley Davidson Flashlight and radio $70.00. See? There is life in the old macho dog yet.  A booming flashlight and handy radio inside Harley Davidson’s trademark toughness. • AM/FM radio. • Powerful light. • Utility style aluminum case. • Unique hanging handle.

The Casio BH200A-8 Biorhythm watch. $59.95. There was a time, peeps, when this Ferret was very much into Circadian rhythms, but no longer. The errant impulse has now been replaced with a nagging urge to consume strawberry milkshakes. Ah me. Such is life and the nature of true feedback!  Chrome Plated Resin Case Just imput your birthday and press a button for instant grafic display of your biorhythms Biorhythm graph display,Biorhythm graph based on specified date.Physical/sensitivity/intellect rhythum days based on specific…

The Hummer Atomic Clock. $24.99. Oh that’s interesting. A Hummer radio controlled atomic clock. Golly.   The Hummer CD Player. $129.00. OK, so that’s nice too. Er..are we done with the Hummer thing yet? Hummer Boombox. $199.00. Yes yes, it’s a Hummer product. We get the idea. It’s the new Harley Davidson. Now can we move on? Hummer Two-Way Radio. $99.99. Ok, I give up. Surrender. Just make it stop, eh? Please?…

The Tennis Coach Watch. $59.95 buys you a timepiece that will revolutionise your forehand, promote killer baseline rallies and force your opponents into undergoing massive bouts of psychotherapy after every game with you. Or not.  Tennis Scorer keeps track of your tennis game with “”Game”, “Set”, and “Match”. Tennis Coach keeps track of your tennis game with the record of “Unforced Error”, “Force Error”, “Double Fault”, and “Service Winner”. 30 segment memories capacity for tennis scorer and tennis coach.

The Wedding Countdown Clock. $19.95. Girls, this Xmas give him the pressie that’s guaranteed to remove all traces of stress from his brow. Honest!  Countdown clock measures the days, hours, minutes, and seconds to your wedding! Great gift for the bride-to-be. Enter your wedding date into the special countdown clock, then watch as the days, hours, minutes and seconds tick down.

The RCA Nostalgic Stereo. $200.00. Dudes, if we go any further back into retro time, we’re going to end up selling wooden tin cans and replica string with a CD player attached. And what’s with the hand crank, does it make ice cream too?  • Three-speed turntable. • CD player with LED display. • AM/FM radio with lit dial. • Built-in stereo speakers. • Wooden case. • Ornamental metal horn and hand crank.

The Hello Kitty 3.2 megapixel Foxz3 digicam. Made by Che-ez! Much weirdness.

The Weather Glass Barometer. Reclaiming weather from the microchip, eh? $17.99.  Now you can predict the weather! Simply fill the glass barometer with water. Atmospheric air pressure changes 6 to 12 hours before weather change. The change in pressure causes the water level in the vase of the Barometer to rise into the spout. You can predict the weather according to the relative height between the water level in the spout and vase.

The Tranquil Sounds Bath Pillow. $40.00. Buy one and get to look like Meg Ryan’s younger sister?  Relax to five soothing nature sounds—and make every bath a retreat. Our waterproof bath pillow gently cradles your head and neck—and eases away tension with five digitally recorded nature sounds. Choose from North Woods, Ocean Surf, Stream, Summer Night, and White Noise. Completely waterproof design—speakers and sound controls are perfectly suited for use in the bath. Makes every bath a relaxing retreat.

The Weightless Headset. No, not a decapitated horseman, but a rather funky cordless, handsfree telephone, which looks rather useful. $129.95.  You’ll forget you’re wearing this cordless, hands-free headset phone until it rings, and then you can answer at the push of a button. Since the phone weighs less than 1 1/2 oz., you can leave it on for hours and never miss a call or have to stop what you’re doing when talking. You can dial with the integrated keypad…