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Electronic stain zapper.


It looks like the latest generation of electronic stain removers cost less, are more compact and may even work as advertised. If we believe the blurb, of course. Ah me, such is progress. $29.95.

 This amazing new device will remove virtually any clothing stain, no matter how stubborn. We tried it ourselves, putting it through the most rigorous tests, and it passed them all. The Sonic Stain Remover is one of our most impressive products and looks to be a sure-fire hit with consumers. Try it on all types of stains. You won’t be disappointed. All it takes is a few drops of water and some rubbing and the stain will be gone. It utilizes ultrasonic technology-120 vibrations per second. Not a trace will be visible


  • Um, “ultrasonic technology-120 vibrations per second.”

    “Sounds” fishy to me. I’ll bet in Europe it’s 100 vibrations per second.

    And I’m betting that it’s only ultrasonic to… to… to whatever those animals are that communicate by grunting in a really, really deep voice. Their name escapes me at the moment.

    Yeah, sounds like an AC synchronous motor that rubs the stain back and forth, just like Mom, except much faster and without all the spit and Kleenex.

  • Elephants. They make subsonic noise. You mean elephants Bill. And they are far too big to use as stain removers. Trust me on this one!

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