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InterNot Hall of Shame.

Proof indeed that dumb-ox lawyers, when faced with something they don’t understand, will invariably make things worse. I feel another wiki coming on!

The Top 10 InterNot Hall of Shame.

1. Sellotape.
‘Hyperlinking to this site, is not permitted without the express prior permission of Sellotape.’
Clearly not the brightest of lawyers, they have…ahem…stuck to their guns even after all the adverse publicity. Well done NotLink Losers!

2. BP Solar.
‘You may not frame this site nor link to a page other than the home page without our express permission.’
Solar energy right? 21st century, cutting edge technology? Made laughable by 18th century legal eagle stupidity. Nice one!


3. Yamaha.
‘You are granted a revocable and nonexclusive right to create a hyperlink to this Site so long as the link does not portray Yamaha, its affiliates, or their products or services in a false, misleading, derogatory, or otherwise offensive manner.’
Hey, you can only link to us if you’re nice, OK? Otherwise we’re gonna sulk an’ take our ball home. So there! Muppets!

4. Geico.
‘We request that you not create any kind of hyperlink from any other site to ours unless you first obtain our permission.’
So does politeness excuse stupidity? Er…..naaah! Still a bunch of dufus lawyers missing the point completely.

5. On The Border.
‘Any creation by you of any kind of Hyperlink to the site is not allowed without the permission of Brinker International.’
Please also inform us if you intend to pass any of our restaurants in your car, as this will also require our express consent. Sad, sad, sad.

6. Zurich American Insurance.
‘By completing the information requested below, you will have permission to establish a hyperlink from your website to our website: zurichna.com. After clicking on the “Submit” button, you will be brought to a page that has instructions for your web programmer on how to put our hyperlink onto your web site.’
Wow guys, thanks for making it so easy to fill out an online permission form. We’re really grateful, ’cause it’s so very difficult to add links to our pages. Because of that I’ll really try hard to promote your stupidity on my website now. Sigh!

7. National Board of Forensic Chiropractors.
‘You may only Link to our home page at “http://www.forensicexaminers.org.”‘
Short, sweet and still stupid. Perhaps a little more ‘analysis, investigation and examination to obtain the truth’ would help your lawyers, eh?

8. Paula Abdul.
‘You may not download, hyperlink, hotlink or reuse our content (including text, images, audio, visual and other media) on your own personal or Paula Abdul related web site.’
Oh dear, sweet Paula. The nation loves you, but laughs lustily at your sad luddite lawyers. No really, they do!

9. Laureate Education Inc.
‘No permission is granted here to you to use Educate’s icons, site address, or other means to hyperlink other Internet sites with any page in the Educate web site. You must obtain prior written permission to hyperlink in any manner to the Educate web site.’
Oh my! Perhaps you folks ought to educate your lawyers, ’cause they’ve clearly not got a cotton picking, K12 clue about the Internet. Shudder!

10. Enterprise Funds.
‘At your request, you can be granted a limited, revocable, and nonexclusive right to create a hyperlink to the Web site. This is a one-time permission granted on a “per URL” basis. Permission from Enterprise must be obtained for each link with an independent URL. A change in the link will require resubscription.’
Wow, you guys are really going to be busy granting link permissions for each and every one of the 5 billion or so URLs on the Web. How are you going to find time to provide all your expert financial advice? Or train your lawyers and their monkeys?

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