These wireless Rotobotmouses from Aaron Ristau may look very exotic but they’re actually based around conventional Logitech optical mice innards. That means they should work rather well. Priced at $180 a meece and handmade to order with a 30 day turnaround. Bemuse your friends!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3LlG22rZf2E
Specific character keys, colors, and other features are available. The AA battery runs for several months and is accessible by 4 simple screws on the bottom.