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Worst press release, EVER!

A while ago I received what is unquestionably the worst official press release I have ever received in all my years as a journalist. A release so bad that it actually transcends dreadful and moves into the realm of something beautiful. And so, in the way of things, I must now bring it to your attention, especially since I know that a number of colleagues in the ‘trade’ read the Ferret and may appreciate it. Just be thankful that this is not your company. Click to read the full, lurid release in all its glory (with identities removed for obvious reasons).

Worstprpic2
my blurring

Picture caption: ****** MD (Left) and ***** Operations Director (Right) get ‘THE LOOK’ at ***

PRESS RELEASE FOR *****.

DATE: 17th October 2005

WORD COUNT: 411

‘NEW LOOK’ ***** Unveiled

Following continued growth and development, ***** – one of the UK’s most successful internet technologies organisations – has re-launched the company’s logo, marketing materials and website (www.*****.co.uk) with effect from 3rd October 2005

The specialist web technology company has taken the step to re-brand as part of its ambitious expansion plans.  The new logo is a simple, memorable symbol that will eventually be recognised on its own without any written text. The new logo is fresher, more creative, and represents a significant move away from the old corporate blue colour that it replaces. Based upon the abstract ‘a’ shape, the rotational symmetry of the new logo suggests movement of information and communication – which is vital within *****.

Commenting upon the re-brand, Managing Director at ***** said: “We work in an industry which is constantly evolving and changing in response to customer needs and expanding technology, we wanted our new logo, marketing information and website to reflect this. The new corporate identity, combined with our new business development programme will allow us to expand further into new areas, providing scope for future growth.”

After more than 10 years of deliberate and successful growth, with six members of staff, the change reflects the improving range of products and services offered at *****. This growth and development has been organic, driven by clients’ requirements for more unusual and sophisticated online solutions.

Continuing further **** said: “The company is entering an exciting era, with the logo change, the launch of new products and services, and an increasing client base. The new logo is rolled out across our marketing literature and our new website, which we anticipate will extend our business even further both in ********* as well as throughout the UK.

ABOUT *****

Specialist Internet Technologies Company, ***** have been at the cutting edge of IT since their inception in 1993. Based in *******, the company is founded on commendable principles, which remain at the heart of the business today, operating in a unique style, building long-term relationships with clients and exceeding their expectations every step of the way.

***** offers both clients and staff a liberated culture, where enterprise and entrepreneurialism is applauded. Transparent costing, an accessible design team and innovation are at the heart of everything ***** does to provide clients with the best solutions to meet their needs.

Established in 1993 by ******* ;***** operate a de-centralised management structure, nurturing creativity and motivation across the team.

ENDS

For more information, contact *********

Red – who has written posts on The Red Ferret Journal.


8 Comments

  • What i just don’t get it. is the new logo *****? or what the ***** represents. an answer would be cool.

  • No, the ***** mask the company name and the names of the personnel and locations involved. Don’t want to get anyone overly upset now do we? :-)

  • but they want the info spread out there, that’s why it’s a press release! I think you should help them spread their joy!

  • Some people just don’t get it.

  • Ah, but Steve, you must understand my dilemma. If I name the guilty parties, and so give them the publicity they greatly desire, then I am contributing towards making it a VERY GOOD press release. So, in order to maintain my truthfulness, I am honour bound to keep it as the WORSE press release evar by not revealing the details. It’s a tough one. :-)

  • Gee, this sounds an awful lot like http://www.arkom.co.uk. Just a guess.

  • Boggle!

  • This sounds awful lot like http://www.nwdservices.com . Just a guess :)

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