The Solar Spark Lighter. Clearly not that useful if you do a lot of your lighting up at night, but worth remembering nonetheless. $9.95.

The Pedalite. A battery-less pedal light incorporating flashing LEDs which operate automatically using the motion of the pedals as the power source. Yes guys, excellent idea and clever tech indeed. Go to the front of the class immediately. $86.48/£59.99 a pair.  Pedalite multiplies the spindle rotation using a gearbox and generator to convert rotational energy to electrical energy. Sufficient energy is available to energise the LEDs immediately and charge a storage capacitor. The capacitor provides residual energy enabling the pedal…

The AuraGrid Wirelesss Extension System. Er…so when is a wireless network not a wireless network? Answer – when it’s ‘enhanced’ by an AuraGrid coaxial cable system. So let’s see, you distribute the wireless signal round the house using coax? Hmm…give me a while to think about it…Priced at around $84.00.  Tired of those wireless dead-spots in your home? Frustrated with slow file transfers because of interference in your wireless network? Introducing AuraOne’s revolutionary AuraGrid Wireless Extension System, designed to completely…

The RF 5AD Musketeer 3 sound quality controller. Think vacuum tube and VU meter trimmings ‘for a warm analog sound’. Wondering who needs this? Yeah, me too. $49.99.  Cooler Master Musketeer 3 is a sound quality controller that filters the accurate digital signal of sound to a much more harmonic output in a classical way – Vacuum Tube Technology. With its dial VU meter and cascade volume control at the front panel, Cooler Master Musketeer 3 brings you back to 60’s…

The Air Sack Alarm System. OK, so Babelfish notwithstanding, this may or may not be a wake up engine for very very deep sleepers. Alarm clock clicks into action, pump blows up the sack, you wake up or tumble out of bed, whichever hurts first. At $800 plus, we’re talking a lot of alarm clock here peeps.  Rising time is set with the “time set device”. When it is set-up time, the air pillow expands by the fact that the air…

The Talking Dog Collar. Remote controlled speaker that you clip to poor unsuspecting pooch so it says fabulously funny things to people on demand. Oh dear, oh dear. Oh dear. $18.98.  Baby you’re so sweet, if I bit you I’d get a cavity.

The RCA E873 Cellular Integrator. Takes no prisoners. What? Oh paff, so that’s interrogator, what’s a syllable here and there? Anyway this puppy is basically another in the growing line of convergent mobile phone home docks. To let you make use of those free talk-time minutes you’ve accumulated. Not sure I’m totally getting this, Margaret. $139.95.  Just dock your cell phone in the convenient docking station, and let it charge up while you’re home. You’ll never miss another call, because…

Hmm…we can think of few things that scream geek chic more than a keychain Ethernet Crossover Adapter. In off-cut cubicle green. Man, that’s cool–ness, ain’t it? $6.99 and eat your heart out Emporio Armani.  # Connect this directly to a standard network cable to convert to a crossover cable # Carry fewer cables and save space # Comes with small chain for connecting to your keyring, backpack, tool bag, etc. # Handy for network maintenance and testing # Small, very…

The Hand Roll Piano. No, not a piece of fashionable sushi, but a second generation roll up piano from Yamano Music. Built in speakers, 20 internal demo songs, and MIDI output. Hey and it’s got vibrato. Killer! Around $160.00.

Voice Thrower. The hands free ventriloquist kit, sports megaphone for meglomaniacs. Strap on, plug in, scream. £35.00.  It’s so simple and so light a small child could use it. Voicethrower is worn around the waist on a belt with a quick-release buckle with the loudspeaker situated in the middle of The Belt…The lightweight easy-fit headset is positioned on the head with the microphone close to the mouth.

The ELI (Ear-Level Instrument) Bluetooth Hands Free Hearing Aid device. Connects between Bluetooth enabled devices like mobile phones/PDAs and any Direct Audio Input hearing aid to provide clear, audible handsfree chat. Talk time 2.5 hours, 140 standby with inbuilt mic. Nice.  ELI provides bidirectional digital communication between a Bluetooth-enabled mobile phone and a hearing aid. Since the signal being transmitted between these devices is digital, it is not subject to the same sources of interference as other types of wireless…

The Verilux Rise & Shine Natural Alarm Clock Bedside Lamp. Not only does it simulate the rising and the setting of the sun, grasshopper, with it’s natural spectrum Xenon light, but it plays ‘authentic nature sounds’ to make your day start with a twitter. Hey, and it’s got an AM/FM alarm radio for some heavy rock if all the twittering doesn’t do it.  By simulating the rising and setting of the sun, the Rise & Shine Natural Alarm Clock Bedside Lamp…

The Datech eNose. Some kind of portable air analyser, which indicates how much pollution is in the air, whether you’re drunk and if you’ve got bad breath. Useful little tyke, eh?

The Foot Mouse. Well…let’s see. It’s a computer mouse. That you operate with your foot, toe gives left button click, heel right. There, that ought to do it.  When the foot is moved to left and right, the arrow (the pointer) it moves to left and right. In addition, if the foot is moved slantedly, also the arrow moves slantedly. For example, when the foot is moved to the direction 30 degree before the right, the arrow moves to the…

The Laser Guided Pool Cue. Man, there’s some serious laser action going on in the sporting world lately, isn’t there? Everywhere you turn little beady spots of light splashing onto cowering bits of equipment. Sheesh! So anyway this doozy will let ya out hustle Mr Newman hi’self, providing you’re allowed to walk out of the joint unaided at the end of it all. $49.95.  This is the first laser-guided regulation-sized pool cue. When activated, the harmless visible laser provides a…